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OUR ASSOCIATES ARE INDEPENDENTS
Each Weddingofficiants.com associate is an independent minister / civil officiant and runs their own affairs entirely. This includes their fee amounts and what's included in their fee. The reason that I want you to know this is because we don't know what each associate charges because they are all independent and unique. Rest assured that the associate who contacts you will be most happy to give you whatever information you need and will answer all of your questions so you can evaluate them as your wedding minister or civil non-religious marriage officiant.
NOT ALL OFFICIANTS ARE EQUAL
Some wedding ministers and civil officiants see officiating as a job-job. Others (like myself) can't wait to get out of bed in the morning to learn more and to go further than they did the day before. Some wedding ministers and civil officiants think that the ceremony is about them and that they know what is right or wrong for the couple. Others "get" that it's all about the couple, not themselves at all. Which one would you want to guide you in developing your marriage ceremony script? Which one would you want conducting your wedding rehearsal? Which one would you want up there with you on wedding ceremony day? Which one would you trust the most to follow through on their promises? To come through for you if a part of the going gets challenging?
MYTH: LOWER-PRICED OFFICIANTS SAVE MONEY
For myself, all other things being equal, I will always want to spend less than spend more (who wouldn't?). Like you, I would guess, I like knowing that I saved money. I like know that I didn't waste it. However, I've had lessons along the way. I have learned that if saving money means exposing myself to more risk than I'm uncomfortable with (could end up costing me more in the long run or worse, my not getting what I really wanted), then all other things are not equal. And so, now in my life (wasn't always this way), if cheaper means more risk, I will drop it like a burning hot potato. I wanted to share this with you because I think this is relevant when considering that you're only getting married once and that the quality of your wedding ceremony is important. Do you agree?.
MYTH: HIGHER-PRICED OFFICIANTS COST MORE
Depends on whether you're looking at the fee amount alone or the overall total cost picture. The fee amount will always be more than a lower fee, of course. However when all is said and done, the overall cost could be the same or lower than the overall cost with a lower officiant fee. Consider that maybe you can't not afford to pay more if it means getting what you want and avoiding an unreasonable risk. I find that two universal principles play here: (1) That in life we typically get what we pay for (wedding ministers officiants are no exception); and (2) Not all officiants are equal; they each see and do their jobs differently. In being a full time wedding officiant myself and in working with other officiants for many years, I have learned that the combination of these two principles means that an above average or way above average officiant is likely to cost more than an average or below average quality officiant for a given wedding ceremony site area. All other things being equal, you will typically receive a proportionately higher quality result for whatever you spend--you will get what you pay for. Consider that your ceremony, the one time you are getting married, is worth being as good, as fantastic, as your love together. Consider that the wedding minister (or civil marriage officiant) is an important person in this happening.
"OUR LOVE DESERVES #1 BEST---OUR WALLET DOESN'T HAVE THAT MUCH"
Of course. This will never not be the case. And too, I am sure you would agree that because you have limits on what you can spend on your wedding, it can be (and probably has been already) challenging to make certain choices or to cut certain corners. Your love together knows no boundaries and does in fact deserves it all, yet your pocket book is not bottomless. So what to do? Given the way it is right now, something's gotta give of course and so the question becomes: which corner to cut? Which item to spend more on? I don't know this for you of course, but I have written an exercise that you may find helpful and, perhaps, will have tangible, practical value for you.
EXERCISE:
1. Take out a pencil and paper and draw 4 verticle columns on the paper entitling them at the top, as you see below. Then, together, brainstorm and write down in the first vertical column (on the left side of the paper) a list of categories of costs . These categories will reflect your plans for wedding day; from cakes and flowers and venue to the ceremony and music provider, etc.
2.Then, in the next vertical column (2nd from the left side--Categories Rated), and corresponding to the categories you just wrote down, using a number range from 1-5 (go higher if you have more categories), rate each category from least important to you (lowest number) to the most important to you (highest number). This may not be easy to do this because your love together deserves it all without any limitations, but nonetheless, make choices.
3. Now, in the next column (Category Budgets), keeping in the same row as the categories of the prior columns, write down the approximate dollar amount you've budgeted for each category.
4. Then, in the last vertical column (along the right side of the paper--Budgets Scored) put a number from 1-5 that corresponds to the size of the amounts you've budgeted for each category (5= the most amount of money budgeted, 1=the least amount of money budgeted). Your worksheet will look something like this:
5. Now look the 4 columns in the example and then in your example. Observe the relationship of the items to each other in each column.Does the #1 of the each category match the #1 of dollars budgeted? How about the others? The lowest? What else do you see? Of course some items just cost more and need to cost more. Does the couple who did the above example chart have the higher dollar amounts budgeted matching their priority ratings? Or is there a higher priority item that is getting a lower budget allowance? How about your chart? The same? or? Any insights so far? When you look at your own chart, are you seeing any clues about cutting corners?
6. Now, apply what you learn from observing this to reflect on which corners to cut for your wedding day. Ask yourself: Am I willing to trim the budget for a lower rated item in order to have more available for a higher rated item? If not, reflect on this a bit so you can understand this more. Consider this idea: that the results of the exercise provide you the opportunity to see clearly what is important to you and to be able to best honor it.
It has been my hope, in writing this page, that, perhaps, your planning will be enriched and more quality will be added to your wedding day. Thanks for reading it.
Abundant Prosperous Financial Wishes (and all that jazz),
Paul Michael
Email me with any question small or large
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